Thursday, October 7, 2010

the lesson

Only about half the jobs I’ve ever held I left voluntarily. But terminated or not it is never easy to move on. Part of this is because of the obvious reason, I do not like change. But the other reason is not so obvious at least to me. I don’t know if other people can tell this, but it is somewhere that I still lay on a lot of denial. I try to convince myself that I don’t need other people.
Now it is true that I prefer to work alone but I don’t think that’s unusual. But I am lying to myself when I believe that I don’t need to see anyone or talk to anyone all day. And another little corner of denial that I like to dwell in is that other people would not care to be around me. So I would tend to walk around work all day thinking that everyone is better off when I keep to myself.
But that was a deception that I created to shelter myself. And in the three years I have had at my current job that today is my last of I have enjoyed the company of my co-workers. I have had a difficult time this week saying good bye to people. I read the card everyone signed again sometimes.
These three years have been years of personal growth as I’ve learned humility, patience and perspective. But this last week has caused even more personal growth as I discover how much I’m going to miss working with a lot of people who really matter to me. It is a somewhat painful lesson but one of the most valuable I’ve ever learned. Thanks everyone.

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