Three Dog Night is one of my favorite bands in the oldies category. I still turn up Joy to the World and Old Fashioned Love Song will always be special because it was the first song I played on the radio for Prajna.
I disagree with Three Dog Night about the number one. Their song proclaims one to be the loneliest number. One isn’t lonely, one is a strong number and sits high where it can see all the other numbers stretching away.
Let me explain. I knew my numbers before kindergarten but the classroom is where I was formally induced to them and I perceived the numbers having personalities. For some the odds were masculine and the evens were feminine. Most were pretty agreeable, but not all. Two is blue, maybe because of the rhyme or maybe because two is moody. Three is the life of the party, unflappable and rude. Four is shy to the point of being quite a prude. The number five is the closest thing to a deity there is on the number line. Five is like the Apollo character in that Star Trek episode with cosmic like powers and even a soft gentle side. Six is conceited. Seven is mysterious and a little scary. Eight is pretty powerful too but tends to be a bit OCD.
And then there’s nine. My friend found a note I scribbled a few years ago and he sent it to me. I wrote the note after discovering some folks had put a bunch of chairs in stacks of nines. I wrote this:
Why do they have to stack the chairs in nines? Why nine? I hate the number nine.
Nine is asymmetrical. It's one less than mighty ten and one more than the helpful eight. But don't feel sorry for nine.
Nine is a wet fart on a hot day. It's the feeling of cheap peppermint gum when the flavor is almost lost.
Nine is a dinner guest no one wants to sit near. Nine salts food before tasting and scuffs the bathroom tiles.
Nine is the sound of a leaf blower in a stairwell on a Sunday afternoon.
Nine is the color of scrambled egg residue soaking on a skillet in the sink waiting to be scraped away.
Nine has the odor of melted plastic.Yeah that’s how I feel about nine.
This blog has been pretty shallow. I can always justify that I’m just trying to keep the wheels from rusting up but that excuse is getting a little rusty too. So here is the point, I don’t take a whole lot of stuff seriously. So today was flippant. And it felt great.